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The Stranger Babysitter

Sitting in a public space

Reading a book

Will attract the largest

Loudest

Messiest family


Just by opening a book

Your body language somehow screams

Come sit next to me

Start a conversation…


Hell

I even offer babysitting

And life advice sessions…

Free of charge


All because

I appear knowledgeable

Don’t worry

Your kids are safe with me

While you go get a pint of beer or vodka

Or whatever the fuck you parents drink


I can’t exactly go back to reading my book

When your 3-year-old is trying to

Drink my coffee…

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